Sex without intimacy is like dancing with no music

Sexual intimacy is such a natural, integral and core part of adult life and human relationships because it helps to reinforce the physical connection and emotional bond with your partner. It brings an added depth, connection, deeper love and togetherness in a relationship.  However in this day and age of sexual freedom, disconnection and tinder many are forgetting the art of intimacy and sex.

​Many bypass intimacy and often go straight to sex before they even get to know each other. Alcohol is used to get sexual confidence, and this brings further disconnection. Past relationships, fears, anxiety and past trauma can all block real intimacy in a relationship. For some couples, maintaining closeness and a healthy sex life can be difficult in modern life, and it is often pushed down on the priority list due to family commitments, work stress, mismatched sex drives, and becoming new parents can all get in the way.

Intimacy is the path to deeper connection, love and depth

Intimacy is the breath of emotional, spiritual and intellectual connection. It is the heart of a strong, healthy and loving relationship as it allows you to know someone deeply from a place of love and connection as you become completely free and open with your partner.

Sex in a loving relationship should be the physical embodiment of intimacy. It should come from a place of love and connection rather than fear, anxiety, judgement and disconnection. Sex and intimacy are a natural cycle of love and connection: Sex builds intimacy and intimacy builds sex.

Sex without any intimacy or emotional connection is like dancing without music

Many are afraid of real intimacy as it feels too vulnerable and raw to allow themselves to open their heart and be fully seen by another. People hide behind self-made masks and are afraid to speak openly and honestly about their heart’s desires.   Men hide behind performance and women hide behind their thoughts and disconnection from their body during sex. Many are afraid to love freely and to be loved openly.

When a couple comes together to have sex, and intimacy is missing, it is often a mechanical act, and they are disconnected as it becomes a one-dimensional experience as each person tends to focus on their own physical pleasure, performance and sexual release.

The importance of sex and emotional engagement in relationships

Sex in relationships is important because sex is a bonding behaviour and it brings a couple closer in ways other methods can’t.  Sexual intimacy gives space of deeper emotional connection, heart opening and intimacy. Sexual intimacy creates a multi-level experience which encompasses each and every part of you – your mind, body, heart and spirit.

Emotional engagement and sexual intimacy in relationships enriches your life, allows your mind, body and heart to expand and you experience deeper and more meaningful relationships. When you have a successful, loving and intimate home life your transforms: you become a stronger leader at work, you have more energy and focus to succeed, and feel much more fulfilled and satisfied as you work towards your goals and real happiness.

How to move forward in your relationship with sexual intimacy and emotional engagement

​If you are ready to create profound changes in your relationship you need to break down some of the old programming and old ways of being. You need to step into a place of freedom to allow yourself to be fully seen, and also allow your partner to do the same – without any judgements. You need to learn how to be vulnerable as you follow this new path. You need to get out of your head and back into your home of your body and heart.

“When love awakens in your life, in the night of your heart, it is like the dawn breaking within you. Where before there was anonymity, now there is intimacy; where before there was fear, now there is courage; where before in your life there was awkwardness, now there is a rhythm of grace and gracefulness; where before you used to be jagged, now you are elegant and in rhythm with your self. When love awakens in your life, it is like a rebirth, a new beginning.” John O’Donohue

About Linda Connors

Linda Connors is a hypnotherapist and coach providing Intimacy Therapy Programme for men, women and couples let go of fear and embrace their mind, body and hearts to experience deeper levels of sexual intimacy.

Start building a better intimate sex life today by calling Linda on 075 3421 3557.

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