Articles and writing with Linda Connors
Are you seeking what feels like the exclusive orgasm?
Perhaps you have never experienced an orgasm, or don't think you had one. Or perhaps you only have had orgasms occasionally, or only through self-stimulation and pleasure without your partner. Or maybe your orgasm never quite reaches its peak.
Rest assured you are not the only one.
Never underestimate the effect not being able to orgasm has on you. As Europe's Leading Sex Hypnotherapist, I have worked with many women who are not able to orgasm. Some of whom are very successful in their careers and hold leadership positions but feel like they are failing in the bedroom.
They often feel something is wrong with them, incomplete, ashamed or embarrassed that they are not able to enjoy what many others can - or see the unrealistic portrayal of sex and women's orgasms in movies. They want to enjoy it for themselves and their partners. However, something deep within the unconscious and physical level is holding them back.
Does this sound or feel familiar to you as well?
Not being able to orgasm is often very frustrating especially when you love sex and are very attractive to your partner.
There are many barriers, beliefs, cultural beliefs, blockages which stop you from having an orgasm to your full potential. Your relationship with your mind, body and heart also influences your enjoyment or sex, the ability to let go and sexually express yourself.
I want to share with you ten factors why you can't orgasm and the solutions:
1. Not sexually aroused
Solution: Explore and experiment in a fun and loving way with your partner. Have fun with foreplay. Read books to get ideas - the Karma Suta is a great starting point for new positions.
2. Do not know your own body and what turns you on
Solution: Self-pleasure and masturbation are healthy expressions of who you are as a woman and sexual human being. Let go of any guilt, embarrassment and shame you may feel and explore your body with curiosity, openness and fun. Discover what turns your on. Where you like to be touched. There are plenty of new products aimed at women and self-pleasure. Explore, have fun and enjoy!
3. You put too much pressure on yourself to orgasm
Solution: When you put too much pressure and focus on having an orgasm it builds up more frustration, stress and tension in the body. Sex is like life. It's not about the destination - it's about the journey. Enjoy each sexual moment and pleasure without any expectations of what may or not happen in five or ten minutes. Get out of your head and return back into your body.
4. You find it difficult to let go and give up control
Solution: Experiencing an orgasm either by yourself or with your partner requires the ability to fully let go - on a mind, body, physical, emotional and heart level. If you find it difficult to let go sexually, emotionally and physically during sex - sex hypnotherapy can help.
5. You find it difficult to communicate your sexual needs
Solution: Women often find it difficult to ask what they want especially around sex. Find your inner voice and share with your partner what you enjoy, what doesn't work and explore together to find new ways to receive and enjoy pleasure.
6. You fear intimacy or experience emotional issues
Solution: Fear of intimacy, emotional pain from abuse, anxiety, depression and stress or play a huge role in how you feel sexually about yourself. It has a huge impact on your physical body too. Sexual healing is fundamental in healing, recovering, and taking the first step forward to embracing your sexual empowerment.
7. Sex has become too routine or boring
Solution: Talk openly to your partner about your feelings. Use I statements rather than you statements. Invite him to share what he would like to experience too. Create space to talk - it's important to have this discussion when you are not in the bedroom or being sexual.
8. Sex is not the only way
Solution: The old saying "it's the journey not the destination that matters" rings true for orgasms. Sexual pleasure also comes from natural emotional highs, a deep sense of love and connection to your heart. A good sex life is connected to your attitude, relationship with body, and how open your mind, body and heart is. Explore and enjoy!
9. You are held back by unconscious inhibitions and beliefs about sex
Solution: Women carry a lot of cultural and emotional baggage around sex which is often passed down from one generation to the next. Be open with your partner about your fears and inhibitions as this makes the unconscious conscious.
Some inhibitions and beliefs about sex may be adamant due to culture, religious or conservative upbringing so you may find working with a sex hypnotherapist beneficial to heal and release these feelings and inhibitions.
Solution: Speak with your doctor as medical conditions or medication can cause some sexual issues. Therapy and hypnotherapy can still help but talk to your doctor first.
About Linda Connors
Linda is Europe's Leading Sex Hypnotherapist in London Harley Street, Bath and Skype and specialises in women's sexuality and sexual empowerment. She has created a 5 step system which helps women be sexually empowered to learn how to orgasm fully.
You can take the first step towards changing your life today by calling Linda on 075 3421 3557.